we're going down and you know that we're doomed

I'm going
to
get
sebastian
tattooed on my
right wrist
or back or
hip
black cursive
the artist
wasnt available Tuesday and I couldnt choose a piercing bc tongue will swell for a
week

I want to
quit
but I'll talk tos
Spenser tomoro with the nice of his two faces he'll probably make me feel better
Im sick of it though
I need these bosses for refernces for the zoo but.. Its so hard.
not a happy time just full stress
betrayal lies dishonesty disrespect
pain

Hard
like being a hs outcast but these people should be over this by now

Also I'm contacting the Eskimo place to try to find a toy or miniature and I would like to get to know it early before taking it to ny.
so if I leave here I can do that.

My mom took here wedding pic down.
which I wonder why it was even up til a week ago?? They've been divorced for a year.
good observation. Took me awhile.

Just 19 years of it being there.. I didn't even notice it shouldn't be up tip it was gone.
but the family pic. Seb and dad are in it. She's glad as hellti have them both gone. Surprised she left my pics up. Once she buys the house w her bfs money I'm sure she'll paint my room and throw everything out.

This is quit stressful.
I didn't have stress until late 2nd sem.
the fall looks great though. Fucking brilliant.
Quitting this may actually affect that though. If I don't get the zoo I may have to do fashion and want to change my major.. My best talents but still not my dreams.
I want a horse too. When I graduate. It will be hard to afford but a great want. Its 2 yrs away.. But important.
dog+apt though. Even if I'm zoo-less forever.
I'm lucky.
I've got to stop stressing out!!!